十三、Language Skills
1. Sentence Variety
Example 1:
Change: Beijing’s streets are crowded with taxis, company cars and private
vehicles owned by the newly affluent. The number has been rising rapidly in
the last few years. The latest statistics show there are now 1.2 million
vehicles in Beijing alone.
To: Taxis, company cars and private vehicles owned by the newly affluent
have crammed Beijing’s streets in rising numbers in the last few years--
1.2 million vehicles at last count.
Example 2:
Change: Thousands of buildings met the same fate. This alone is now being
preserved. It marks the center of the nuclear explosion. It is being
preserved as a symbol. It symbolizes our wish that there be no more
Hiroshimas.
To: Of the thousands of buildings that met the same fate, this alone,
marking the center of the nuclear explosion, is now being preserved to
symbolize our wish that there be no more Hiroshimas.
Example 3:
Change: It was quite obvious at that time that IQ equals intelligence.
Since then, however, many people have seriously criticized the idea.
To: The idea that IQ equals intelligence seemed obvious at the time but has
since come under much criticism.
2. Parallel Structure
Example 1:
Change: He retired respected by his associates, admired by his friends, and
his employees loved him.
To: He retired respected by his associates, admired by his friends, and
Loved by his employees.
Example 2:
Change: As a young man he had been to Shanghai, had fought in the Anti-